this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
