omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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