I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize