i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
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Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
And then he peed in my hair
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