oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
MIDGETS
????
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
