bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
