Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Randomize
