you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
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