the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
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