ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
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Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
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The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
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