I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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