I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
This is my life. Enjoy the view
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I touched a dick in church today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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