I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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