I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
