I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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