We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
