Please, let me fuck your mom
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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