omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
