Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
This is classic penis vs brain.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
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