How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Randomize
