i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
