There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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