There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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