I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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