guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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