Your tits are I can't wait for
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
