i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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