Are we in a gay sports bar?
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
