Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
Its about making memories worth repressing
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize