I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Come see our sink grown plant.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
