You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
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