everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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