I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
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Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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