he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
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You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
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Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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