If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
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