Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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