so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
