6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
