she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize