This is not my ceiling
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
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So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
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He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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