I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Randomize