so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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