just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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