quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
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