So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize