WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
