I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
