I faked an abortion last night.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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