I seem to have left my pride at pride
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
