my vag is so smooth its legendary
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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