Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
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Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
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No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize