This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
