You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
